Soul Remnants

Wednesday, June 18, 2003

 
Tattered and faded like a flag flown day and night through weather of all kinds, I lower myself into bed. Too tired to blog, too tired to piece words together that have any substance, too tired, too tired...Good night moon.
Coyote Girl 6/18/2003 09:39:00 PM

Tuesday, June 17, 2003

 
Today was my first day back at work after having a lobectomy in April and all was going well until the last forty-five minutes of the day. While I was out on medical leave, a very close friend at work attempted to create a situation that was hurtful to me. When my supervisor told me about what had transpired, I was stunned, then hurt and moved at record pace to angry as hell. However, I have learned, the hard way, that when anger is the predominant emotion, it is best to let the fire subside before stepping into the fire pit. My friend has seen me through two surgeries in the past year, spoiled me with special gifts, shared in my good and bad times and always has been someone I can depend on.
So you can imagine my surprise to learn that she had tried to stir up something while I was recuperating - the details are not important. The only thing of importance is why? After talking the situation over with another friend and confirming the situation with my former supervisor, it was time to go home and mull the mess over. After examing the situation, I decided to let the anger go, but the hurt wants to hang around me for a bit. Disappointed in my friend, I also know that no one is perfect and although I do not understand her actions or the reason for them, I cannot bear the loss of the friendship or the strained worked relationship that would result if I confronted her. This situation is not the first time she has hurt people who really care about her; however, it is the first time that I have been the target. I think my friend is needy in a way I do not understand and that she uses the creation of discord as a method of getting attention.
For now, I will say and do nothing as I believe that her good qualities far outweigh the negative. I pray that time will lessen my hurt and that over the course of our relationship, I will gain insight and understanding of my friend. In all honesty, I do not know what I would do if a similar situation where to arise in the furute...I believe that I would be less likely to let it go.
Coyote Girl 6/17/2003 09:22:00 PM

 
Hello
Coyote Girl 6/17/2003 08:49:00 PM